Let’s take a quick look at the primate family tree; what do you see in common with a rhesus monkey and a mountain gorilla? Probably not much; but they are still primates. Now let’s take a look at preppers; as I’m sure you already know there are many varieties. I’d like to take a moment to discuss some of the types I’ve noticed and maybe you can find out which category you fall under; or help me with some types I missed. It is also possible that you are a combination of several stereotypes, as most of us are. On a side note, these are all generalizations and meant to be taken with a grain of humor.
Last Minute Men: this guy is one of my favorites; and sadly enough usually has an abundance of knowledge and skills. He will look at you, being perfectly frank, and tell you that his plan in the advent of catastrophe is to go down to the local outdoors store and grab a weapon and ammunition, then hit up the grocery store for water and supplies; after which he will hijack an old bus and make his way into the woods; or something like that. The rest of us look at his meticulously thought out plan and really have nothing to say.
Hippies: this brand of prepper probably already lives off the grid. While primitive skills people are often confused with hippies they are not one in the same. These guys tend to be environmentalists. These guys grew up reading Back to Basics and now make their own clothes, grow their own food, have likely built their own environmentally friendly home, and are generally considered to be one with nature. These guys love foraging and can teach you a lot about living off the land.
Canning Moms: these moms, and occasional fathers and children; look at survival as being dependent on how much canned food they have stocked in the basement. They are typically well organized, cycling through their food and replacing it as it is consumed. These families often enjoy the produce of their own labor and maintain large gardens.
Geardoes: this is a military term I heard on a clever take on the weirdoes that collect all the coolest gear; hence, geardoe. These guys will buy all the latest and greatest in military tech. They likely have the match grade AR-15 with multiple interchangeable sights but lack basics such as food storage and medical supplies.
Paramilitaries: these guys approach all situations as if it is a battlefield and are often closely affiliated with the geardoes. They utilize acronyms, hand and arms signal, terminology, and even abbreviations borrowed from the military. While they may have some cases of MREs tucked away, their primary focus is on fire power and how to wage a guerilla war.
Doomsdayers: you laugh, but any day the bulk of humanity is going to be destroyed in a giant nuclear bomb, or a solar flare, or a flood, a killer disease, or another ice age. These guys subscribe heavily to Hollywood myth and the latest doomsday show on television and are the most likely to have a bunker under their home. Within their survival cache you are likely to find radiac meters and biological protective suites alongside their food storage.
Primitive Living Experts: this is a wide variety of persons; including knappers, mountain men, trappers, colonialists, blacksmiths, and other such living history experts. These people are expert foragers and confident in obtaining small game for meals. While often lumped in with hippies, these folks stand out as their own due to their love of history and learning how things used to be done. These guys likely know all the basic skills for sustainable individual living.
Talkers: these guys know everything; if you have something, they have the same thing only better. If you have gone through a survival experience they have also; only their experience was more hardcore. These guys are also closely affiliated with the geardoes.
Hunters (and campers): these guys love spending time outdoors; they live for the wilderness. These guys live to track, make animal calls, hide in bushes, analyze scat, and on occasion even shoot something. These guys have a plan to load up the truck and trailer and go into the woods when the SHTF; planning on living off what they can track and kill. These are the best guys to teach you about reloading and nonmilitary firearms.
Right Wingers: these guys will tell you all the ways the government is slowly strangling our freedoms and being led down an orchestrated path that has been in effect since Woodrow Wilson. Everything is a conspiracy theory, and if you disagree it is because you are part of the system. The less government the better. While the first and other amendments are important; for these guys it is all about the second amendment and distrust of any governing system.
Medics: while many of these guys actually have medical certificates and real world training, others have simply taken a few CPR courses and watched lots of YouTube videos. These guys pride themselves in first aid knowledge and can be a valuable addition to any survival group. To them the epitome of preparedness is being able to perform triage in a mass casualty situation and put people back together.
Scouters: this brand of prepping relies heavily on wilderness survival. These guys have gone through the ranks of scouting and earned all the merit badges that matter. As they grow older these guys often find themselves in positions such as scout leaders and advisors; where they part with their knowledge to the next generation. You can spot these guys at scouting events because they are likely wearing only apparel that was purchased at a scouting office and have a hiking stick they made prior to receiving their eagle.
Economists: these preppers and doomsdayers focus on economic decline. They know all the finer facts of the Weimar Republic and put no faith in fiat money. These guys likely stock pile precious metals and invest in the foreign markets that look most likely to succeed our own. They carefully spread their wealth around so it can’t be lost all at once.
Dead Men Walking: these preppers don’t prep; they have analyzed the threat and decided that life is good now and would not like to survive an apocalypse. They will tell you they’d rather be at ground zero in a nuclear blast than survive in a bunker and have to rebuild civilization.
Homesteaders: these guys already have it going for them. They likely live off the grid, have a self-sufficient piece of property, solar or wind turbine power; and possibly even a composting toilette. Most of these guys aren’t worried about the world ending, they simply want to be their own boss and enjoy the fruits of their own labor.